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This resonates with me to an uncomfortable degree--I always joke that my school friends were Barbies, but that's because they fit the Swedish beauty ideal, and it definitely showed, so I always considered myself ~The DUFF~

But I have more to say on this "Is it hot to envy another woman’s looks?" makes me wonder how much of this is about misunderstanding dynamics between women/girls because within fandom spaces, yes. That type of fixation is considered romantic, ex Yellowjackets' Shauna & Jackie; fandom has reframed what we see of Shauna as a lesbian obsession. I remember seeing that for MSCL's Angela and Rayanne as well. Or maybe it's not misunderstanding as much as wishful thinking? I don't know. It seems to always come from observers though.

ETA: and dur, of course Archie's Betty and Veronica which did get portrayed as a hot relationship ultimately in Riverdale.

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Agree about the intense fixation - I’m really not sure if there is a genuine homosexual element or not. As a young teen when I fixated on an older role model girl, I felt I wanted to become her but was also really enthralled by her beauty and kind of wanted to worship it/her.

It’s hard to explain, not sure I’ve managed it. Could just be the hormones at that age honestly!

Would love to know if boys feel something similar as well?

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I don't think that as a boy I gave a single thought - like, literally, not one - to the way other boys looked. I did note their athletic performance, whether they were smarter, faster, stronger. And whether they were nice, funny, or dangerous.

I also thought pretty much all girls were pretty. I think if women knew how much men liked them, they'd be perpetually amazed and maybe alarmed. (But not denying the dangers some present, of course, or the complexities of relationships.)

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That’s so interesting to hear! I wonder if it’s something to do with the different things girls/boys value in older peers and want to emulate? It makes sense that athletic performance and personality would be higher on a guy’s list. For women I would say it’s looks (including personal grooming) and personality.

I think you are right - girls would be a bit alarmed (but also amused!) at how much guys liked them. As teens girls are brutal on themselves over their looks, because we can judge other women harshly on theirs and compare ourselves… not sure if that will ever change tbh.

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Right, except that I think for me there might be a different dynamic on emulation. I'm not sure I emulated any "peer" at all. I emulated people too far above me to be considered peers. "Heroes" might be a better word for it, although that suggests some sort of unattainability I don't intend. I concerned myself very little with actual peers. That could be the result of some eccentric upbringing, idk.

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Yeah, perhaps I didn’t word it correctly, it was a kind of hero worship of the girls for sure. Girls might tend to ‘imitate’ a lot more than boys, not sure.

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