Main character, so what's that like?

I’m so vain, I probably think this satirical article is about me. (It is though, is the thing.)

There are rules for what to do when a pile-on strikes. Don’t engage. Don’t apologize (unless you actually did something wrong). This presumes you know this is what’s happening. I did not know. Partly just because Twitter’s defunctitude means the good and bad o…